When I was twelve, my brother had a bike accident and fell into a coma that lasted a whole week. His life was suspended by a thin thread and the family stood by, barely breathing ourselves. He fortunately survived.
But that intense period as a youngster sitting in the general ward of a government hospital hosting critically ill patients (for over a month) and his painfully slow year of rehabilitation left indelible memories.
The realization that death is inevitable and life can change in a second hit me hard. I have never lost the clarity of that seeing.
Subsequently, death has been sitting at the edge of my awareness most of the time. I have had to deal with sudden deaths and long drawn ones. I have lost immediate family and pets. Over the years, perhaps my personal experience has drawn many friends and clients to me in times of their own encounters with news of its impending approach and the death event itself.
My learning from all this has been that building a healthy relationship with the fact of our mortality can help us to lead a rich, fully lived and loving life. Further, we improve the odds of dying well, by living well.
And to die easily, quickly and smoothly is a blessing.
However, as most of us apparently prefer to live in the conscious or unconscious denial of this basic law of life, and we can procrastinate, for the most part, we tend to leave a lot of unresolved emotional business for our last days. We also fail to build our own spiritual framework of what this transition means to us and how we can best cope with it.
Little conscious effort goes into disentangling from our worldly attachments and into acknowledging and mitigating our fears and resistance to our inevitable crossing over.
As one loved one said to me towards his end, “I left it too late. I can’t possibly change overnight and nor can I now set right everything I would have liked to. Help me prepare as well as I can now.”
Moments like these have prompted me to compile a few suggestions for those tending to someone who is dying:
- Do your own clearings first, so that you are able to be as fully present, calm and compassionate as is possible. Carrying your own fears or emotions into the room means you are making things harder. Drama and empathy are not helpful, nor should they be confused with love. Love is being the best you can be and holding the clearest space you can for the person undergoing the transition.
- Keep a light(diya/candle) burning at all times in the room. It provides a calming anchor to everyone.
- Facilitate as calm and quiet an atmosphere as you can. There is much processing going on and undisturbed rest is useful for this.
- It can be heartbreaking and torturous to witness, and it is human to sometimes wish the process be speedy. I gently remind you to release all your resistance to how things are going and how long they are taking. It is not fair for us to bear the pressure of our own (unspoken)weakness or preferences on the person. Allow them to move at their own pace. (God alone knows what we will do when our own time comes, isn’t it?)
- If rage, anger and frustration come up for you, or for them, know that they are but fear and helplessness in disguise. That may help in being more patient.
- If you believe in a higher power, whether it be a God, Angel, Light Being or Source – pray and request assistance for the transition. (I believe such prayers are answered.)
- If you are open to it – the Mahamrutyunjaya Mantra played softly in the background often brings peace to everyone and helps in overcoming the fear of the unknown.
- If so inclined, have all close ones individually express their love, forgiveness and letting go. Even unconscious patients seem to respond to this and I strongly feel that many a time, a long drawn death is because they are waiting for someone in particular to come to terms with this separation and give their permission to leave.
- If there are particularly difficult grudges do deal with, consider John Newton’s Comprehensive Forgiveness Prayer.
- ‘Cord Cutting’ to release sticky attachments with the dying person can be visualized: Imagine yourself and the dying person bathed in pink light. Now visualize a golden light figure of eight encircling you two in a way that the other person is in one circle and you are in the other. Send love, thanks and forgiveness sincerely their way. Then ask Archangel Michael to cut this imaginary figure of eight into two with a swift movement of his sword. Ask that the person be escorted into light.(Know that the love can never be ‘cut’ away.)
- Similar to the earlier two points, the practice of ‘Ho’opononpono’ can be useful at such times.
- If possible, suggest to the person that they look for the light and move towards it. This reduces their confusion and bewilderment of what they should do.
- Four years ago, I wrote a set of energetic clearings(see list below) to help at such times. Since then this list has been shared discretely with many people. The feedback has been positive enough for me to share them publicly now. Because the subject and such times are extremely sensitive, I have hesitated to post these before.
- There is no way for me to accommodate every perspective and belief that is out there. So please take them in the spirit that they are offered – one of pure intent to lovingly support a transition, without imposition or disrespect of any sort. Use what you find useful, and leave the rest!
Clearing Statements To Assist With A Smooth Transition.
- These statements are an attempt to comprehensively address the issues I most commonly observed through the many transitions I have been present at. The clearings are designed to facilitate completions and leave the timing to grace. (In a couple of rare cases, there have been surprising recoveries after use of these statements. If there is any linked effect at all, I would guess that they found the time, energy and clarity to action some completions, before moving on many months later. )
- I wrote these statements about 4 years ago, except for perhaps three or four of them. Those few were notes from Access Consciousness material. The styling of most of the statements is also along the lines of Access Consciousness Tools. Unfortunately, I have no recollection of the exact source and which of these statements I noted from there, but I believe that they were from one of Gary Douglas’s talks. The rest of them I have written myself. Credit and thanks to Elma Mayer of Now Healing(Align and Disentangle are standard commands from the ‘Now Healing’ system), and Gary Douglas and Dr.Dain Heer for whatever material (and ‘The Clearing Statement’) they have shared freely over the years.
- Those acquainted with Access Consciousness will know the use of The Clearing Statement: “Right and Wrong, Good and Bad, POC and POD, All 9, Shorts, Boys and Beyonds”®. It is to be said after each of the statements listed herein. (If you are not accustomed to its use, please click here for an explanation.)
However, if you prefer, you may modify the statements for use with any release technique that you are comfortable with. For example, in recent times, I usually use the simple, intuitive command, “Release, Dissolve and Let Go Now.” after each statement and I find it to be quite effective. Another clearing option is “Disentangle Now“.
- If so inclined, and physically capable, the dying person can actively run the clearings for themselves as frequently as is feasible. If that is not possible, these can be recorded in a familiar, calm and loving voice and it be played on loop at a barely audible volume in their vicinity. In most cases, there is a shift in energies within 1 to 3 days. However, sometimes, it takes much longer.
- Everything that prevents you from knowing and acknowledging that you have achieved all your goals and that nothing is incomplete in your universe, uncreate, delete and destroy all of that right now.
- Anything that prevents you from knowing that your body is as infinite as you uncreate, delete and destroy now.
- All the ways in which you have judged, denied, rejected, or disowned your self or your body uncreate, delete and destroy all of that right now.
- Anything that prevents you from forgiving yourself, forgiving all others and receiving forgiveness from all, uncreate, delete and destroy a godzillion times over across all time space and dimensions right now.
- Anything that prevents you from releasing any anger, guilt, blame, shame or fears around health and disease, living and dying, uncreate, delete and destroy across all time, space and dimensions right now.
- All the ways in which you have invested in this reality that prevents you from having a totally different reality, uncreate, delete and destroy a godzillion times over right now.
- All the ways that you punish your self by punishing your body uncreate, delete and destroy across all time, space and dimensions a godzillion times over right now.
- All the human points of view, perverted points of view, fixed points of view, inherited points of view, absorbed points of view, collective’s point of views that you have bought into about life, death, health, disease, suffering, dying, living, this reality and the afterlife, uncreate, delete and destroy across all time space and dimensions right now.
- All the ways that you have identified and limited yourself to this body, uncreate, delete and destroy across all time space and dimensions right now.
- Everywhere you bought other peoples ideas, thoughts, feelings, emotions and judgments about entities, ghosts, spirits, death, dying and life after death, will you destroy and uncreate all of that a godzillion times over now?
- All of the oaths, vows, swearings, fealties, commitments, comealties, binding and bonding contracts that you made with any and all beings that you are currently stuck to based on all of those commitments, rescind, revoke, recant, reclaim, renounce, denounce, destroy and uncreate all of that times a godzillion right now.
- Uncreate, delete and destroy all your relationships right across all time space and dimensions right now.
- What would it take for you to love, forgive and accept yourself? Anything that prevents you from taking necessary actions or making the required changes, uncreate, delete and destroy a godzillion times over across all time, space and dimensions right now.
- All the biomimetic mimicry you are using to keep in place the long drawn physical and emotional suffering that you are choosing, uncreate, delete and destroy across all time, space and dimensions right now.
- All the events, circumstances, biomimetic mimicry, inherited experiences and beliefs, trapped emotions, limiting beliefs, cellular memories, auric imprints, future programs, entities, astral entities, morphic fields, implants, explants, oaths, vows, promises, agreements, contracts or anything else that contribute to your creating, institutionalizing, maintaining, perpetuating, solidifying, densifying and making real the belief that deterioration, long drawn suffering, helplessness, dependency, despair and or abandonment is inevitable in the ageing and dying process, uncreate, delete and destroy across all time, space and dimensions right now.
- What generative energy space and consciousness would it take for you to continue to actively learning, teaching, innovating, productively working with joy ease and grace right till your last day of living in this body? What would that look like, feel like, sound like? Anything that prevents that from happening, uncreate, delete and destroy across all time space and dimensions right now.
- What would it be like to make a smooth, quick, easy, graceful, conscious and aware transition from this body to the after-life at the most divine, appropriate time? Anything that prevents that from happening, uncreate, delete and destroy right now.
- Restore Communion With Earth Now
- Align to Wholeness Now.
- Disentangle from all ties, cords and bindings Now.
- Exit Stage Left
Whenever it is time, my prayers that your loved one experiences a smooth and peaceful transition!
PS: If you find this useful, please share it with others. As this topic is rarely spoken about, most of us struggle in finding help of this kind.