A Prayer To Restore Faith

light and dark trees

I channeled this for someone very dear to me some days back. I shared it on FB earlier and the response there prompted me to record it here for easy and frequent retrieval.

For all the times I pretended to trust god, but I didn’t,
For all the ways in which I kidded myself
For all the ways in which I secretly tried to control
Everyone and everything
Never believing there was divinity at play
All the reassurance that I gave myself to trust and believe
While never feeling the truth of it in any way
For all the events and circumstances that habituated me
To feel let down
To expect to be abandoned, betrayed
To never have anyone to count on other than myself
To never find support, guidance, help or solace,

I pray.

I pray for forgiveness, my own;
From the universal Source,
And anyone else I may have blamed…
I pray that all the deep rooted patterns and emotions
Of helplessness, hopelessness,
Isolation, despair and pain
In every part of my being
across all space, dimensions and time
Be released, eliminated, erased.

I pray to have the awareness,
The lived acknowledgment and understanding,
That can only come from a whole and healed heart
One which has seen the falsehood of a wound,
Relieved of pain that an illusion caused

For every time I have thought myself alone,
Limited, out of my depths,
Pushed into free fall -
There was a wind beneath my wings,
A branch to reach out to,
A soft landing at the end of it all.

It always seems dark inside the tunnel
And though we may have to travel blindly
Stumble, stagger through terrain unknown and new
Know that light can be blinding too
And once these critical steps
Are maneuvered as best as one can
All the while have full, genuine faith

For once our eyes adjust
To the brightness and lightness of all things
We see….truly see again.

“I must be happy. All the time.” – Is That True?

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This post may disturb those inclined towards compulsive positive thinking.  But it is likely to provide much needed relief to those who feel stretched and pressured by this kind of an expectation.  For myself, I have found that calling a spade a spade (and a rose a rose!) brings immense ease.  So much of our energy is spent in denial and suppression of our thoughts and feelings.  This very avoidance keeps alive and persistent that which we wish to run from.  As also the consequent self- judgment and perpetual exhaustion.  For when we cannot control what we experience, we end up feeling inadequate and helpless.

Long ago, I read a definition of suffering that made complete sense to me:
Suffering = Pain * Resistance
It was credited to Shinzen Young and I am most grateful for this useful gem of a reminder.

It is true that despite releasing our resistance, there may be plenty of pain. However, my experience has shown that the suffering does indeed reduce in direct proportion to our acceptance. As Byron Katie says, “When I argue with reality, I lose—but only 100% of the time.

Life is full of ups and downs.  The good thing about impermanence and transience is that everything changes.  Some things bring us pleasure and others pain.  The more we are obsessed with avoiding pain and seeking pleasure, the greater our fears and need for control.  And frankly, I have yet to meet anyone who has had complete control over what comes into their life.  However, what we can modify is our response.  A combination of best possible efforts and a genuine acceptance of whatever emerges puts us in a place of more mature and consistent joy and peace.  This kind of  joy stems from a full acknowledgement and engagement of the full spectrum of life, without any blinkers or filters distorting whatever is.

This insistence and addiction for a superficial happiness seems to take root as we grow up.  A child can do nothing, daydream by himself, have a fall (cry and get on), play gleefully with friends – and be equally content at the end of each fundamentally unique, dissimilar day. The source of happiness is within, born from the uncomplicated, authentic, light hearted and unhesitant expression of being. There is contentment because comparison and competition have not yet seeded the constant, irrational and unfounded inner voice of ‘not being good enough’.

But then we start parking our happiness in specifics such as a particular income, car, home, appearance, partner, child, etc….  These may have little to do with our intrinsic values or tastes, but are more often the consequence of our deep needs for belonging, validation and approval.

Hence, it is not uncommon to be trapped in the seeking of outer objects of affection that can only be temporary, or relationships that can only be changeable. 

What can be an even more disheartening consequence is the predicament of  attaining such ‘goals’ and finding it has brought no genuine  or lasting happiness.
When your heart and soul is not in sync with what you have been chasing, when you have sacrificed not only precious life years and energy, but also much of what you actually consider sacred and valuable in the name of so-called practicality or peer pressure, the disappointment and lostness can feel crippling.  Because now there is the additional need to meet the expectation, “I should be happy. I got all the trappings of what is considered  ‘a success’ by common norms; if I am still not happy, there has to be something wrong with me.”  

Should you have experienced a phase of contentment and happiness, you may find that you also have to let go of it at some point.  The partner may die, the stock market may crash, the fame may fade…  Now you also have to deal with the fear of losing happiness once you find it.  And once again you ask yourself why this is happening, despite all your strategizing and manifestation attempts.

Which brings one back full circle to that which set one off on this unrealistic quest in the first place:
(1) The need for external validation, approval and
(2) a desire for an assured, constant state of happiness

If you would like to experiment with an approach that differs from this one, try tapping the questions below with EFT or ruminating on them for a couple of weeks. Note any changes in your mood and energies.  Should any specific insights arise, then note them down and take concrete steps to implement what you feel necessary – to find more joy and ease in the playful expression of your being and the full engagement with this miracle of life:

  • How much more would I enjoy my life if I welcomed all of it with ease and grace?
  • What would it be like to sing my own song rather than dance to anyone else’s tune?
  • How much more expansion and ease would I experience if I allowed myself to acknowledge things as they truly are? People just the way they are? Myself, just the way I am? Without judgement, distortion, filters, blinkers or resistance?
  • What would it take to release the need to control and micromanage every aspect of my experience, myself, others and my life?
  • Would acknowledging that there is yet more for me to learn and know increase my willingness to love, forgive and accept myself, others and my life?
  • What would it be like to experience  flow and surrender? Would it make me happier and lighter? What would that take?
  • What would it take for me to allow all my emotions, to embrace my human experience with kindness and gentleness?
  • Would I be willing to give myself permission to be more joyful and centered than I have ever been before? What would that take?

I would welcome hearing how this experiment works out for you.  Please follow the links in the article and browse many of the other relevant posts on tools and discussions to assist with deepening this process.

If you find any of it useful, please do share it with others!

9 Clearing Statements To Address The Fear Of Uncertainty

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How much more energy would become available to you if you were to become comfortable with not knowing?  

How much more ease and flow would be yours if you could navigate times of uncertainty with patience and grace?

Most of us have a deep desire for control. Deliberately, or otherwise, we attempt to anticipate outcomes and take preemptive action against everything we have labeled undesirable.  There are two factors that are relevant here:

The first is that our labels of right and wrong, or good and bad, come from our limited knowledge and understanding.  They are entirely based on past experience and conditioning and may be inappropriate in the present.

The second is that any transformation takes us through a period of flux, where things are emergent.  Much as we would like to, we can rarely bypass the turbulence and uncertainty of such times.

October has been a most interesting month for me.  It brought significant change in many aspects of my life and relationships and also opened up new possibilities. Some of these are welcome while others not so much! Not knowing where things will eventually lead triggered a restlessness.  I honestly believe that I am able to have such mild reactions because I have done so much of my own clearing over the years, and continue to invest in daily, mindful practices.  Nevertheless, this period gave me time to revisit and refresh some clearings I had written for myself around the subject of Uncertainty.

As it happens, I know that a lot of my immediate family and friends are also struggling to find their peace in the face of transient situations.  So I thought I would share these clearings here.

The following clearings come from substantial experience at drawing out subtle aspects that contribute to such fears.  Reading them in itself may bring more awareness and understanding to your own specific situation.  They have been framed along the lines of Access Clearing Tools and those familiar with Access Consciousness will know that you can run the Access Clearing Statement – “Right and Wrong, Good and Bad, POD, POC, All 9, Shorts, Boys and Beyonds®” after each statement.   For a detailed explanation on the Clearing Statement, please click here.

Alternatively, simply read aloud and tap along all the EFT points as you are reading. You can download EFT in one page here if required.  For a more detailed understanding of EFT, you can get my book – Emotional Freedom Techniques.

It may be convenient for you to make an audio recording in your own voice and loop it for use with either Access or EFT. Some of the words may be unfamiliar, but let your experience speak for itself.  Run these clearings several times a day for about a week and let me know how it works for you!

  • All the fear, anxiety, resistance and mind fog associated and triggered by uncertainty, will you uncreate, delete and destroy across all time, space and dimensions now please.
  • All the conditioning, agreements, oaths, vows and promises that solidify, densify and make real all resistance to change, expansion and newness, will you uncreate, delete and destroy across all time, space and dimensions now please.
  • All the desperation for certainty, control, predictability in order to feel safe, will you uncreate, delete and destroy across all time, space and dimensions now please.
  • All the events, circumstances, cellular memories, inherited emotions and beliefs, picked up from the collective, entities, and astral entities, that demand, insist, ordain and perpetuate extrapolation of known history will you uncreate, delete and destroy across all time, space and dimensions now please.
  • All the ways in which we individually and collectively assume, expect, desire and perpetuate stuckness, sameness, history and limitation, will you uncreate, delete and destroy across all time, space and dimensions now please.
  • Every habit, limiting belief, cellular memory, future program and auric imprint that locks, restrains and binds the individual and collective in old, outdated paradigms of fear, distrust, mistrust, lack and inadequacy, will you uncreate, delete and destroy across all time, space and dimensions now please.
  • All the ways in which we resonate, amplify, mirror and perpetuate fear, anxiety, insecurity, inadequacy between DNA, energetic DNA and soul family members, will you uncreate, delete and destroy across all time, space and dimensions now please.
  • What would it be like to truly know at all times that nothing real can be threatened and nothing unreal exists?  Anything that prevents that from showing up will you uncreate, delete and destroy across all time, space and dimensions now please.
  • What would it take to discern between fear and caution, projection and reality, imagination and awareness? Anything that prevents that from happening, will you uncreate, delete and destroy across all time, space and dimensions now please.

Poems: Bridging The Illusory Divide

Vondelpark - Tanushree Vaidya Photography

Love is unconditional.
It has no beginning, nor end.
It cannot be switched on or off
Much as one may pretend.

Relationships are a different thing
There is a ‘you’, and ‘me’, and a ‘we’ there
Either bridges are built together,
Then sustained with attentive care,

Or to neglected ruin they fall
Unable to accommodate
Conflicting needs and wants,
Routine wear and tear

To confuse the two
Is to err
Love is synonymous with being
Flow, a background that is just there

To ground it in the day to day living together
One has to become present, responsive, aware,
Remembering the choices, actions
Each individuated self makes
Affects the collective space we share

If and when one can see
There is no other, only me
Contrasts and similarities appear and resolve,
Morphing, integrating rhythmically

But relating to these mirror selves
Is something learned slowly, gradually
Until then, the road ahead
Is best navigated pragmatically

Photo Credit:  Tanushree Vaidya (all rights reserved)

Beyond Drama

Victim, Villain, Hero, Sage.
Captivating roles that keep us engaged.

What would it be like to see the long repeating patterns in our relationships in a different light?

What would it be like to be free of these old, habitual stories and their consequent drama and trauma?

I shared the poem below on Facebook a few days back and it struck a chord with many of the readers. Based on their response, I feel that tapping it in with EFT may be helpful, in resigning from any dramatic roles one may have auditioned or signed up for, and choosing freedom instead.

We seek the exact match
To the frequency we want to keep alive
Or the frequency that we thought
Has us defined

So the doormat finds the feet
The savior the weak
The conman his mark
And the blessed,
Angels in human form

Examine your contracts and vows
Neutralize descriptions and names
Tear up the terms and conditions
Invite the other to do the same

We don’t have to perpetuate our illusions
Let’s wipe the slate clean
Release each other
From the roles we offer and keep

There is no need
For either to suffer more
Guilt, blame, pain or shame
Erase this habitual pattern and story
Let us our freedom reclaim

Synchronistically, I came across this beautiful song on WordPress.  Thanks to Monica Cassani for posting it at Beyond Meds:

Related EFT Tapping Scripts:

Resigning From Playing Villain
Stepping Out of the Cage

A Powerful Centering Tool

flickr/kalexanderson

“All the ways in which you are choosing

Shallow over Meaningful
Pretence over Authenticity
Conformity over Creativity
Habit over Presence
Denial over Awareness
Repression over Expression
Approval over Self-acceptance
Incompletion over Wholeness
Fear over Love
Past over Present
Fantasy over Reality
Stagnation over Change
Familiarity over Flow
Resignation over Acceptance
Seeking over Remembering
Procrastinating over Living Fully Now…

Would you be willing to uncreate, delete and destroy across all time, space and dimensions right now?”

You can use the above in any or all of the following ways:

  1. Use along with the Access Consciousness Clearing Statement. For an audio recording that you can loop, click here.
  2. Tap along the EFT points as you read or listen to these words.
  3. Contemplate these statements and note the thoughts, images and sensations that arise without judgment.

In all cases, be open to allowing your insights and inner guidance to show up and then take suitable actions where ever required.

As always, the request is to share your experience and if you find this useful, please share it with friends and family.  Thank you!

Image Credit: Flickr/Kalexanderson (Creative Commons License) 

4th Blog Anniversary – List of Select Posts

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The intent of this blog, my books and FB posts is to give back.  Like everyone else, I have had my fair share of tough patches.  While I have been fortunate to have family and friends support me through such times, there are a vast number of people out there who remain anonymous.  Anonymous not because their name was not on the article, or book, FB update or message board.  But because their only emphasis was on the content they provided.  

Our point of contact was not a long term association, but a single instance that delivered to me exactly what I needed in that moment.  Then they blended back into the generous ocean of the internet, leaving ripples of relief in their wake.  The dedication and quality of information (in every sphere of life) that can be found on the web is humbling.  The ability of some people to give of themselves, inspiring.  In the modern world of social media, many prefer to watch silently from the sidelines, or find it easier to criticize than support. But there are also those who pro-actively offer what they can from their heart.

So while I pray my thanks and blessings for such people, I feel the need to pay it forward through my writing.  To share of myself and my learnings as authentically as I can.  In the hope that something that someone needs to hear today – reaches them through me.

My 117 posts  thus far have been fueled by this intent. While the search box can help, I am using the opportunity of today’s fourth blog anniversary to gather together some of the posts that seem to have been considered particularly useful or informative.  EFT Scripts have not been listed below as I have added a tab to the top menu for the same.  Please remember that my Poems here and on the FB timeline can also be used for tapping.  I invite you to bookmark this page for ease of navigation to these articles, as and when required. If you like what you find here, you are most welcome to subscribe to the blog and share it with others.

Last but not the least, Thank You to those who read, like, comment and share my writings. You encourage me to keep on!

Below are links to select articles on:

  • Processes
  • Authenticity
  • Relationships
  • Multiple Resources

Processes

  1. A 5 Minute Exercise to Reclaim Peace
  2. Contemplating the Stars
  3. The New Beginnings – Daily Meditation (with GD)
  4. 9 Buffet Tips That Can Be Applied To Life
  5. The Pause Diet For Joy and Peace

Authenticity

  1. Are You Singing Your Own Song Or Dancing To Another Tune?
  2. 9 Tips To Reinventing Yourself
  3. Unpeeling Our Labels
  4. Point of No Return
  5. Great Expectations
  6. Beyond All Excuses
  7. Home is Where The Heart Is
  8. Lifelines and Why We Cut Them Off
  9. ‘You Are Here’ – Mapping Your Way Forward
  10. Through The Looking Glass – Seeing Beyond the Image

Relationships

  1. 4 Cues To Transform Your Relationships
  2. Blinded By Familiarity
  3. Going Further With The 4 Agreements
  4. Superwoman – Would You Be Willing To Hang Up Your Cape?
  5. Speak Up

Multiple Resources

  1. Are You An Earth Sensitive? and Why You Need to Know
  2. Tools For Empaths
  3. 11 Ways to Address Helplessness
  4. 11 Ways to Be Present to Another’s Vulnerability
  5. What Do You Need To Unlearn Today?